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Responding to a Child's Pornography Use

A father sitting at a kitchen table with his teenage son. The father and son are talking with each other.

Parents may wonder how best to respond upon learning that a son or daughter is involved with pornography. The following suggestions may be helpful:

  • Avoid responding with shock or anger. Instead, be genuinely concerned and talk with the child in a respectful way.
  • Express your love and your desire for your child to have a happy, successful life.
  • Ask how the problem began, how long it has been going on, and how extensively the child is involved with pornography.
  • Find out how the child feels about his or her involvement and whether he or she plans to continue that involvement.
  • Avoid preaching, threatening, or condemning. Rather, appeal to your child's better judgment. Admonish him or her “with all the feeling of a tender parent” to listen to your counsel (see 1 Nephi 8:37).
  • Teach your child about the dangers of pornography—how it distorts sexuality, causes users to view others as sexual objects, leads to various forms of immorality, and addicts its users.
  • Share your concern that involvement in pornography can jeopardize your child's future happiness and eternal well-being and cause spiritual death and eternal disappointment.
  • Encourage your child to talk with the bishop and to get professional help if needed.
  • Provide help and encouragement as the child strives to overcome the problem.
  • Once the problem has been brought into the open, keep the lines of communication open. Sexual transgressions thrive in secrecy but are less likely to recur when talked about in a sensitive, caring way.
Henry B. Eyring

"The best counsel for us to give young people is that they can arrive back to Heavenly Father only as they are guided and corrected by the Spirit of God. So if we are wise, we will encourage, praise, and exemplify everything which invites the companionship of the Holy Ghost."

– Henry B. Eyring, "Help Them on Their Way Home"

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